Never knew much about my father
Never asked him what it felt like
I kinda wanna know if we got the same stuff in our blood
Sometimes I can't shake this feeling that I'll
I'll get what I deserve
I don't know what I deserve
I wish I believed in a God that loved me
But I can't even believe in myself
Or anything
Some nights I wake up panicked and hot in a cold sweat
Some nights I sleep just fine
I need to call him
I wish I knew why my brother went to the army
Or what he was running from
Or to
But I guess some things you don't get to know
Or believe in or pray to
I guess some things just exist on their own
Same clothes as yesterday
Similar friend and the same exact seat
I swipe my card and tip the same
Unique transaction ID
Another gender ID for friends
That can’t relate to me
She says I want go home cry and smoke some weed
Just please don’t take this from me
She says I know it don’t belong to me
But don’t--please, don’t take this from me
And I know it don’t belong to me
But I can take this
Everything is different when I feel this way
And the weight of the world exists in my face
And scratch her on the arm and wish it away
Oh sweetie you’re not from this place
But really all she says thanks and goodbye
Real quick and I stand there arms on my side
I’m reaching for my headphones
Can’t even think can’t react can’t act
Like I wanna take her home
See my arms are mostly skin
And when you bite into the flesh
The white you see is purity and structure
Goodness all my empathy
Yeah my arms are mostly skin and when
You bite into the flesh I bleed
But I don’t cry I’m here for you
'cause I can take this.
Been talking about how you changed
And things that are not in your brain and how
You miss me just the same
You read my face just like a book
Never could get past that look
You gave me when i lied
I’m better off than i was
But change is hard and that’s because
I can’t hold onto it
Surface cracks and fades to black
You fucking know i need you back
I’m no good by myself
Everybody put your best dress shirt on
And head to the funeral
Her family is waiting there by the door
They don’t recognize you anymore
Burned my candle to the core
Spilled hot wax on the floor
I can’t do this again
The way this works you’ll never know
Take it fast or take it slow my god
We did this again
My roommate's yelling killing his best friend
Bent on a keyboard index finger
Ring finger a ring on it
But I will never count on it
My girlfriend's crying and I'm feeling nothing
Tapping my finger index finger
Watch tv and speak clearly
You're not like me you feel lonely
You watch tv
In groups you speak
You hate working
You're not like me
You watch tv
You don't like things
You feel lonely
You're not like me
I lift my bike over my shoulder
Convince myself that I'm getting older
I pass a black cat dead on the sidewalk
Text her a joke that's dry as chalk
I pass the same cat later that day
Write a note in my phone to feel it later
Think about all the words that she threw around
Write a song in my home and I feel it now
And I want my old phone back
All the notes I had
All my AIM threads back
And the things I said
Want my old friends back
All the notes we had
All our AIM threads back
And the things we said
All the things we could read
All the things we believed believed
about
**Note: All proceeds from this split will be donated to The Trevor Project.**
CJ - This is a split EP between myself and my very talented friend, Colly. Check out his bandcamp at xcollyx.bandcamp.com Thanks for believing in DIY music.
credits
released January 6, 2017
Songs 1 and 3- Written and recorded by Concrete Jumpers
Songs 2 and 4 - Written and recorded by Colly
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